The UTAH POOF

So I hear that there is a phenomenon in Utah that does not exist in any other state. It is called the "Utah Poof." This is where a girl "poofs" her hair in the back to create a weird sort of helmet shape. I don't quite understand the appeal. I mean, there was a similar look in "Battlefield: Earth," and I guess the crystal skull in the final Indiana Jones movie had a shape very much like this particular Utah style, but do we really want our females attracting aliens? Is this meant to lure them into abductions? If so, why? Did Marge Simpson start this? How does this sort of . . . well, to be honest . . . butt-headed look . . . start? Mankind may never know. I ask those of my two or three readers out there: Have you seen this "Beam-me-up" style anywhere else in the world?

     

Of course, with the guys looking like their crotches and butts are hanging around their knees, perhaps we shouldn't worry. I mean, it's only fair. The guys make it look like their butts are at their knees, and the gals respond by putting theirs on the back of their heads. Hmmm . . . . either one is better than guaging their ears. I wonder what they'll come up with next.