Angel Note

Angel Note
"If Music be the food of Love, Play on!" -- Wm. Shakespeare, Twelfth Night

Sunday, November 8, 2009

A Riddle for You

Both of my brothers have received rejection notices from publishers for their books. This is not an uncommon occurrence in the publishing world, so I thought I'd lend a hand here. So, I have a riddle for you.You are preparing a script for a new movie you know will be a huge hit. You want the Hollywood execs to approve the script for immediate production. Here are the rules:

Your movie is a murder mystery.
Your main characters include:   A Judge, a lawyer, a police detective, a clergyman, a gay couple, and a prostitute.
In order to sell your script quickly, who was the victim? Who is the murderer? Why did they do it? 
I already have the answer, and am trying to think like a Hollywood Bigwig. Impress me.


Delirious said...

Hmm...The victim is actually multiple people. The clergyman was Catholic, and gay himself. He killed the gay couple out of jealousy. The prostitute was a friend of the layer...a very GOOD friend. She was arrested by the police detective for soliciting, but the lawyer got her out of jail. She went to confession and met the clergyman, and then when she heard about the murders he committed, she asked her lawyer friend to take his case. That's about as PG rated as I can get. :P I would probably do better coming up with a Disney movie script.

Stick said...

The victim is the prostitute. One of the two in the gay couple is actually Bi. He hires the prostitute, and is discovered by his partner, who then kills the prostitute in a jealous rage.


The victim is the prostitute, and the killer is the judge. He has been having an elicit affair which the prostitute discovers. She has been blackmailing him, so he kills her, but frames the gay couple. When the case comes to trial, he is the judge hearing it. The police detective, working with the lawyer, puts all the pieces together to clear the gay couple, and convict the judge.

Mr. Giggles said...

I like all of these so far, but you are missing some important aspects. Try to think like a movie producer. I will reveal MY answer in a few days.

Inklings said...

The gay couple went to the priest to confront him about his anti-gay marriage activism. They came to blows, but were interrupted by the policeman who had run over from the nearby hospital where his mother was dying to get the priest to perform last rites. The homeless male prostitute had come in pretending to pray, but really had the intention to sleep on a back bench for the night. So later when the policeman was called to the murder scene in the cathedral where the priest lay stabbed to death, he arrested the gay couple and called the male prostitute for a witness. During time of the trial, the prostitute was also found dead in an alley. In his cowboy boot the police discovered a knife that had a trace of dried blood on the hilt. It was eventually discovered that the prostitute had recognized the newly transferred priest as the priest who had molested him as a boy when he lived in Chicago.He stabbed the priest 27 times in the heart, once for each time he'd been molested. He had run away to the Bay area because of the angst the molestings had cause, but had forced to become a male prostitute to survive on the streets. The person who killed the prostitute was the judge. He had been hiring the prostitute because he was hiding that he was gay. The prostitute had recognized him in court and had attempted to blackmail him. The judge did not want to be discovered because he had married a high-connected heiress, so he killed the prostitute. However, the prostitute had left information in a sealed packet with a friend with the instructions that it be sent to the policeman in the event of his untimely death, so the judge was caught.
Moral to the story: If you ever end up killing a male prostitute, shake his booty. :0s

Mr. Giggles said...

teehee. this IS fun!

Mr. Giggles said...

I like all the comments, especially Inklings' detailed script. That was actually fairly close. If you want to think like a Hollywood director, you must keep in mind: A) What their agendas are; B) Who they see as "victims" and "oppressors"; and C) What sells tickets.

The Hooker is dead (one of the gay couple could be too). The gay couple are the ones who solve the murder to keep from being framed for the murder. The judge, the cop, the lawyer, and the clergy man all killed the girl together. After all, hookers are just "victims of our society" who are only working with what life has dealt them. The gay couple are "victims" of our "archaic society and its antiquated value system."

Why they killed her doesn't really matter, although you can bet she was blackmailing at least one of them because they were all seeing her. We don't need to go into that.

Needless to say, in Hollywood, anyone who represents authority or moral values is portrayed as a fanatic psychopath. All those who lead lives of depravity are victims. That way, when teens go to movies, they see that it's not only okay, but "cool" to do the things their parents have been teaching against.